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Friday Afternoon Ramblings

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I don’t expect most people to understand this, but Christmas just isn’t the same for me anymore.  In part, that’s because of what my ex-wife did to me on Christmas morning, but there’s more to it than that.  Of course, I miss my children more this time of year than any other, and maybe if they were with me, I’d feel differently, but I just feel like the spirit of the season has become distorted and perverted into something profane.  While I don’t consider myself a Christian, I always loved the idea of peace on earth and goodwill to all.

But that’s not the reality of Christmas in this country today.  Now, it’s about celebrating how much money you can spend and how many good deals you can find.  Peace on earth has been replaced by competitive shopping, and goodwill has been replaced by tension over long lines and parking spaces.  The whole charade played out in the name of holiness sickens me.  The yearly garbage from Fox News about the war on Christmas would be laughable if it weren’t so misplaced.

The real war on Christmas is waged when families compete over how much lighting they can install, which by the way is a holdover of a pagan tradition to ward away evil spirits during the winter solstice.  The real war on Christmas is waged when TV commercials mock Santa Claus to demonstrate how good their deals are.  Those are the things that undermine the spirit of giving and distort it into a materialistic competition that has no connection to the story of Christ, whose message was to give to the needy, shepherd the lost, heal the sick, and turn the other cheek.  The real war on Christmas is waged every time someone values the material object over the spirit of charity.

If you want to know where we’ve lost our way in this nation, look no further than that.  The message of Christ, one of love and compassion, has been distorted into hate and competition for political and economic advantage.  I know I’m not the first to point out this perversion, and I know I won’t be the last, but if I can send one message to my country this Christmas it would be to look closely at the teachings of Jesus Christ, not as told by the modern church, but as told by His disciples.  The road to happiness is through love and charity, not through 50% sales, cascade lighting, and an empty ceremonial exchanging of nonessential gifts.  Peace will come with tranquility and splendor.

Humor

Education Ramblings

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The Future of Education!

Warning:  Recently The Ramblings of D. A. Adams engaged in subversive activity with its disparaging mockery of current student engagement and grade enhancement methodologies.  We at the Bureau of Educational Bureaucracy find this kind of insubordination abhorrent and unfounded.  The current policies and guidelines proposed by the BEB and then adopted and mandated by individual states represent thousands of hours of research by administrative professionals, who through rigorous study of theory and abstract concept, understand classroom paradigms more clearly than mere teachers.  In fact, current teacher evaluation procedures were written by an administrator not sullied by the cumbersome and mentally taxing burden of in-class experience.  Therefore, the procedures more clearly define teacher expectations through an unfiltered lens.

As a result of his subversion, D. A. Adams has been taken to an undisclosed location for advanced re-education protocol and, given the re-education is successful, should return to this blog sometime after the next election cycle.  Until then, his replacement, Dr. Bohrdem Tatears, will entertain you with PowerPoint presentations of flow charts for proper use of humor within the social hierarchy of future corporate-modeled educational systems.  Remember, humor is a dangerous tool and, like all tools, should only be wielded by trained professionals.

Editor’s Note: We at The Ramblings of D. A. Adams were unaware that Mr. Adams was involved in such deviant behavior and apologize for his disparaging criticism of BEB policies.  His views are not reflective of the respect and admiration we hold for the All Children Left Behind and Race to a Stop Acts.

Humor

Education Ramblings

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Please Forward to All Faculty Effective Immediately:

Due to increased the standards of the All Children Left Behind and Race to a Stop Acts, the Bureau of Educational Bureaucracy has implemented the following guidelines for evaluating student performance.  All faculty members must adhere to these guidelines without question in order to improve our educational rankings among developed nations.

Section 1 – Does the student attend class regularly and refrain from disruptive behavior?  If yes, refer to Article 1-.01A.  If no, refer to Section 2.

Section 2 – Does the student attend class semi-regularly and refrain from drooling while asleep and/or defecating themselves during class time?  If yes, refer to Article 2-.02A.  If no, refer to Section 3.

Section 3 – Does the defecation have a foul odor?  If yes, refer to Article 3-.o3A.  If no, refer to Section 4.

Section 4 – Is the student armed? If yes, refer to Section 5.  If no, refer to Section 6.

Section 5 – Is the student a proficient marksman?  If yes, refer to Article 2-.o2A.  If no, refer to Article 3-.o3A.

Section 6 – Has the instructor made every attempt to meet the emotional needs of the student?  If yes, refer to Section 7.  If no, refer to Article 2-.o2A.

Section 7 – Has the instructor simplified the material adequately to engage students on their level of proficiency?  If yes, refer to Article 3-.o3A.  If no, refer to Section 8.

Section 8 – Has the instructor attempted doing the work for the students?  If yes, refer to Article 3-.o3A.  If no, please report to the Bureau of Educational Bureaucracy for immediate reassignment.

Article 1-.01A – Pass them with an A.

Article 2-.o2A – Pass them with an A.

Article 3-.o3A – Convince them to withdraw from the institution so their numbers don’t count against us.

Remember, student performance is a direct reflection on your ability to teach.  Following these guidelines will make you a more efficient teacher and improve the long-term sustainability of our workforce development.