Mean Liberals Ramblings – 10/21/2019

With so much fake news swirling around cable TV and the liberal media, I wanted to get a sense of how real Americans feel about our leader’s great and unmatched wisdom. I traveled to Goose Rock, Kentucky to sit down with Bubba Blacklung, graduate of Oral Roberts University, meteorologist for the Goose Creek Missionary Baptist Church Newsletter, and political commentator on Konrad K. Kristian’s Big Blog of Merica. After exchanging pleasantries, I asked Bubba how he viewed recent current events.

“Well, it’s been raining the last couple days, so I reckon God’s sad with all that’s going on in Warshinton.”

Confused, I pressed for details.

“Them liberals like Mitt Romney are saying mean things about the Trump Man. God don’t like when people say mean things about an evangelical leader like Trump.”

I asked how Bubba saw the situation with hosting the G7 summit at Doral.

“I used to smoke Dorals. Real good cigarettes, so I reckon they ought to be good enough for them world leaders. I don’t know what liberals got so upset about.”

Confused, I asked for clarification.

“Them liberals are just mean for saying mean things about this here president. Ain’t no one stood up for Merica like the Trump Man. Our farmers are thriving, coal mines are booming, and manufacturing is stronger than ever. I know cause Fox News told me so. Them liberals are just big meanies for being mean to a good, white, Christian like the Trump Man.”

With all the fake news about climate change, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to question a real life meteorologist about the extremes of severe weather being experienced all over the world.

“I reckon God is just extry upset over Bill O’Reilly being unfairly squeezed off the tellyvision, so His tears is extry big now or days. Them liberals are ruining the world, I tell ye.”

Heartened to have conversed with someone so tuned in to current events, I returned home with a new sense of pride for America’s future.

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