Today’s post is a little different. Instead of me blabbering on and on in my usual garrulous manner, I want to pose a question for all of you, and I want you to answer in the comment section below. I really want to know what you have set as your personal definition of success. Is it related to money? Is it about peace of mind? Does it have to do with leaving behind a legacy? How do you define success for yourself?
For me it’s a blend of being personally happy with who I am as a person, as an artist, and the ability to not let my family starve. It’s a constant struggle between my need to make money and my need to pursue my dreams without sacrificing my family’s well-being in the process.
For me it is earning enough to be “free” to do what I want while still having the “time” to do those things I want to do. You might have more money than you can spend or enough time to do whatever strikes your fancy; however, having both at the same time is the trick:)
Accomplishing my goals, liking myself, setting a good example for my children, doing something with my life that positively impacts the world in some small way, and not digging a hole of debt…I’d say that’s success.
It took me years to figure out that it’s not about money and it’s not about position/power. I realized that I could always want more money and even the most powerful person I know is a nobody to someone, where as a lot of the “nobodies” that I know are legitimately GREAT people. For a long, long time, I wanted to be famous, but not just sort of famous, I wanted to be Elvis famous. Not just for me, but so I could be crazy generous and change people’s lives in a heartbeat. I have begun to realize that I may have to change people’s lives in smaller, slower ways.
So for me, I set some goals that, if achieved, constitute success. They are things like: Fulfilling my chosen roles as well as I can: father, son, husband, brother, citizen, boss, employee, etc.
Next is that I need to “create”. You know about my own fledgling attempts in the creative arts. As long as I am moving those forward, I feel successful.
I feel I am constantly making progress in most of my roles and towards most of my goals. Its never as much or as rapid as I would like, but for me, as long as I am doing my best, learning from my mistakes, and trying as hard as I can, then I can sleep at night.
It’s those nights when I beat myself up for not being a good enough that are really tough. Those nights I’m just miserable, but I am getting better, as I get older, at telling that voice to go to hell.
It’s all about who gets the most money and women–NOT. I think people seriously under-value time. You are successful if you do not loathe getting out of bed in the morning, have money to provide for the necessities and a little for things you like to do, and if you have time to do those things you like to do. What good is money if you are miserable and have no time or energy to put it to good use? What good is it to be so self-centered that you never help others? None at all in my opinion.
If you had asked me this even a year ago I would have had a different answer. Now what I really want out of life is for the people around me to be happy. I want to do everything I personally can to make my family and friends happy. I want to have time to spend with them and show them how much they mean to me.
If people say it is not about the money then they are fooling themselves. Having money provides security for your family. There is a difference in being successful and being immersed in your own success.
Once I reach a point that my bills are paid and my family is secure then everything else is just sugar on top of a strawberry.
Unfortunately if you are not moving forward you are falling backward so you always have to strive for a point of success (ie as much money is coming in as going out) so that you do not feel that you are falling behind.
So basically if you have everything you need today then today you are successful.
Quite simply, living a life I can look back on and say I did the best I could.
Success is what is always just out of reach.