Three and a half years ago, I was a broken man. The turmoils of the economy spiraling out of control had sapped me as I worked two full-time jobs just to tread water. The unrealistic expectations of Tusculum College working me like a dog and treating me like a second-class citizen had exhausted my body. The struggles to launch my writing career had dampened my spirit. And the neediness of a lazy, selfish, lying, cheating wife had crushed my soul as I felt used and discarded like a bag of garbage. Three and a half years ago, I had nothing left to fight with.
For two and a half years, I languished in hell, missing my children, feeling like a failure, believing myself at fault for everything, but still, I struggled to get to my feet. Many nights, I cried myself to sleep. Many mornings, I forced myself out of bed and put one foot in front of the other. I wrote on book three, traveled to conventions, started this blog, taught my classes at Walters State and slowly, ever so slowly, lifted myself from the depths.
Today, I am not broken. Today, my will has been reforged in the fires of hell and is stronger than ever before. Today, my body is hale and virile. My spirit is refreshed. My soul is renewed. Today, I am decent man, working as an instructor of English, writing my fourth book, and building an organic farm. If you knew me three and a half years ago and believe I am weak and shattered, you will be surprised, for while I admit that back then all my fight was gone, today, I’m a new man. Today, I’ve got the green light; I’ve got a little fight. I’m gonna turn this thing around. Can you read my mind?
3 thoughts on “Thursday Morning Ramblings”
I was pretty depressed on the day I read this and it gave me hope. I love the unexpected ping of my email bringing me laughter, hope and inspiration via the blogosphere. I thank you for sharing and applaud the direction your life has taken.
See, we never know who our words may touch or what joy the next day may bring…
Thank you, Coco. I miss you.
Oh and I love this pic! Hysterical :). Have fun this weekend.;