Tag Archives: writing

Tuesday Morning Ramblings


This is my opinion and nothing more.  I don’t typically write advice to other writers or aspiring writers because it feels too pretentious on my part.  Also, the world is already full of authorities who spend the majority of their time and energy telling others how to write, but this particular topic is rather important to me, so here goes:

Writing at its essence is a solitary endeavor, one of the most intimately solitary activities a person can do.  If you need applause and cheers to motivate you to create, you should be a musician or a stage actor, not a writer.  Live performers have live audiences.  Writers spend the vast majority of their creative time alone staring at a computer screen or notepad, allowing ideas to flow through them onto their medium, with virtually no feedback from anyone until after the project is complete.  This solitude can lasts weeks, sometimes even months or years, before an author gets feedback on their project, and usually that first round of feedback is from an editor or first reader who points out most of your mistakes.  It can take literally years before your work reaches its intended audience, if it ever does.

If you need instant gratification, prose writing is not the creative endeavor for you.

That’s not meant to be harsh or put anyone off from attempting to write.  However, it’s a basic reality all serious writers must accept.  You will create alone in a vacuum with no promise of your work ever being read by the people you want to reach.  If that seems too daunting, do something else with your time and save yourself a lifetime of frustration.  Writing is not a glamorous profession.  It’s not hip or cool or sexy.  It’s damned hard work that requires a level of commitment and personal sacrifice that can crack the souls of even the most ambitious and talented who attempt it.

I’m a writer.  At the core of my soul, that’s who I am.  For twenty-two years, I’ve dedicated my life to learning my craft, honing my skills, practicing, failing, getting up, failing again, trying harder, failing again, absorbing criticism, learning, growing, failing even more, and scratching out a meager existence.  A smarter person would’ve given up years ago, but my Scots-Irish obstinate nature won’t allow me to quit.  I’m proud of each and every small victory of my career, but those are not what motivate me to write.  I do it because I must, because the story and the characters demand to be shared.

As I wrote book four this summer, I posted updates each night on Facebook and Twitter to let my friends and readers know how the book was coming.  I did this not because I needed their “likes” and words of encouragement but because, after the years of delays that plagued books two and three, I wanted to assure them that I was working as hard as I could to make certain book four was completed on time.  While their feedback was appreciated, it wasn’t needed for motivation.  The only sustainable motivation is that which comes from within.  External motivators are temporary bandages that can never bolster long-term success.

All that said, if you want to write and need writers’ groups or NaNoWriMo or any other social network to prop up your self-esteem to get you through the draft, then, by all means, use whatever helps you.  If you need to dream of instant riches and overnight arrival to keep you focused, then dream of those things.  You may be that one-in-a-million who gets lucky and has sudden success, but in my experience and after a lifetime of studying the careers of other writers, I know the odds say you will be disappointed.  As for me, I’ll write because I have to.  I’ll follow my personal process for self-discipline.  I’ll edit and spit and polish until I’m tired of looking at the words.  And then, I’ll do it one more time just for good measure.  After I’m happy with the manuscript, I’ll send my baby out into the world to be enjoyed, criticized, praised, ripped apart, lauded, and laughed at.  I will do all of this with no expectations of monetary reward or literary awards or delusions of immortality.  I’ll do it simply because it’s who I am.  I’ll do it because I’m a writer.

Thursday Afternoon Ramblings


I’ve reached a point with this manuscript where I feel like the story is either coming together perfectly or splintering into something incoherent.  I can’t tell which right now.  Up to this point, I’ve felt pretty good with the focus and direction of the plot points, but right now, as everything compresses together for the climax, it feels unruly, and for the first time in my writing career, I feel like I’ve painted myself into a corner without being certain how to paint myself back out.  Part of that is because of the twist that occurred around chapter nine, one which I kind of anticipated but wasn’t certain would happen.  Once it happened, it has taken on a life of its own and completely changed the ending of this book from what I had envisioned.  From experience, I know that can actually be a good development, but I also know that if I lose control of the natural flow, the ending could disintegrate on me.

It’s a delicate balance between allowing the story to develop naturally and steering it in the proper direction.  On the one hand, I feel like this twist has been pretty powerful and will change the entire complexion of Roskin as the protagonist.  On the other, I don’t want to force the climax to happen in a way that seems contrived.  The biggest obstacle I’ve encountered is making the time of the various plot points come together precisely without relying on some cheap trick to have it work.  Over the next few nights, I have to figure out how to blend it all together or risk losing the tension that’s coming to a head.

This is one half the exhilaration of writing and one half the madness of it.  I love when these surprises happen, and I know my best course of action as a writer is to get out of the way and let the story tell itself.  However, for four books, I’ve been juggling various plot threads to bring them together at this moment, and now that I’m there, it feels as if the threads are unraveling on me.  These next two and a half chapters will determine what quality of writer I am.  If I can make this work, I feel like this will a very good book.  If I can’t, the whole series could implode on me.  And I only have a week and a half before the semester begins.

No pressure.

Wednesday Night Ramblings

boys
Dear sons, since you’ve gone back to Florida, I’ve missed you desperately.  When you’re here, I feel whole and alive and happy.  When you’re gone, there’s an emptiness in my heart nothing can fill.  I don’t know why you haven’t been calling me as much as you used to, but I miss talking to you and hearing about your days.  You’re both growing up so fast, and I want to share as much time as I can with you.  You’re my guys, and I love you both more than you can imagine right now.

I’m exhausted from working on this book.  It has taken nearly everything out of me to write it this summer, but I’m almost finished.  One day, if you read my books, I hope you’ll both know that I wrote them for you, to give you something of me that you could cherish and remember and pass on to your children and grandchildren.  You both are my inspiration and motivation, and even though we aren’t together as much as I’d like, I hope one day you’ll find joy in reading this series.

It’s almost time for me to write tonight, and both of you are probably sound asleep right now.  I wish with all my heart I could pop my head in your room, watch you sleep for a few minutes, and kiss your foreheads.  There’s not much harder for parents than to be separated from their children, and for me nighttime is the worst.  While I’m writing, I hope both of you are enjoying happy dreams and resting comfortably.  Please, know that I’m always thinking about you and missing you.  Hopefully, I will see you again soon, and hopefully, we will talk tomorrow.