Category Archives: General Posts

Sports, relationships, parenting, literature, education, and more. If it catches my interest that day, I’ll write about it.

General Posts

Friday Morning Ramblings

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Today, I’ll start numbering and signing the limited edition copies of The Fall of Dorkhun.  It’s a tedious process, but one that I enjoy.  I’ve never had a hardcover version of my books before, and holding them feels a little surreal.  It’s similar to watching my kids grow.  In the beginning, they were these small, fragile things, completely dependent on me for life, but as they’ve grown, they’ve become something more.  It’s hard to put into words.

Recently, I’ve offered to send a couple of the remaining versions of the first edition of TBOD to two friends who’ve been very supportive of me over the last year, so I got out the copies and looked at them.  It’s a wonder I sold a single one.  They were so shoddily put together by the printer, and the art was so simplistic.  I’m sure one day that original cover will make someone’s “Worst Book Covers of All-Time” wall of shame, but even so, holding those versions is still like holding one of my sons.  I had so few resources to work with but wanted so badly for the book to see the light of day that even though the binding is bad (literally, pages just fall out, not one or two either.  Dozens at a time.), the art looks like a doodle (As one person told me.), and the layout is obviously amateurish (I had no idea how to design a book cover.), I still love them.  And there are probably fewer than a hundred of those versions still in existence because they were so fragile.

I realize I’m waxing nostalgic and am being a sentimental fool, but I’m proud of the first printing of the first edition.  I had the balls to step into the arena and compete, the fortitude to weather the criticism and ridicule, and the persistence to keep fighting and keep writing.  Not many can say that.  I took a lot of criticism and heard a lot of teasing, and while it hurt, it also strengthened my resolve.  Today, each of my books has a gorgeous new cover designed by Bonnie Wasson (the first two should be revealed soon), and I have an excellent support system with SSP.  All of the jokes and nasty comments have been worth it because I achieved the goal of that original first printing: to garner enough attention to attract a reputable publisher.

But it all started with an “ugly” book with shoddy binding, and I hope to never forget those roots.

 http://seventhstarpress.com/documents/books.html

General Posts

Thursday Morning Ramblings

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Today’s blog is about respect and common courtesy.  In the words of Vince Lombardi, “What the hell is going on out there?”  Is it just me or does it seem like simple, basic rules of etiquette are relics of the past?  Yesterday, I was treated in the most disrespectful, condescending manner of my life, and while I somehow managed to maintain my composure and not blow up in response, I was so angry after we hung up the phone that it took me a good ten minutes to compose myself enough to enter the classroom.  I was so angry I was literally crying, that kind of angry.

It’s one thing to have a difference of opinion or to have to tell someone something disappointing.  Hell, I have to do it every semester in school with failing students, but there is no excuse for being condescending and pompous in the process.  There’s no reason for arrogance and dismissiveness.   Tone of voice and word choice are important, and in professional arenas, it’s not unreasonable to expect a person to behave as a professional.  Part of professionalism is showing respect to customers and clients, no matter the circumstances.  Respect doesn’t mean ass-kissing.  It means showing consideration for and recognizing the other person’s rights as an individual.

I wrote the other day about Coach Brumley Greene humiliating me during a scrimmage, but I can also tell you that off the field that man has always treated me with utmost respect.  There’s a clear difference between a coach trying to motivate a player and a customer service provider showing contempt for a customer.  Have we just lost this concept in our society?  Am I a dinosaur who needs to adapt to the new norms of our culture?  I don’t know anymore, but what I do know is that what happened to me yesterday is not an isolated incident, and I’m not the only one who has noticed an erosion of etiquette in our society.

Please, share your own experiences or opinions on this subject.  I’m curious to know what you think.

General Posts

Tuesday Afternoon Ramblings

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I’ve told this story hundreds if not thousands of times, but one of the most important lessons I ever learned in life came my freshman year of high school.  I played defensive end on a 5-3 defense, which would be fairly close to the equivalent to the OLB on a modern 3-4.  During a scrimmage with Knox Carter, I missed a tackle because I half-assed got into the backfield and didn’t set a solid edge.  Then, to compound matters, I dove at the running back as he sprinted by me and lay on the ground, feeling sorry for myself for not making the play.  As I lay there, I heard Coach Brumley Greene come charging onto the field.

He grabbed my facemask, lifted me from the ground, and got in my face.  For the next two minutes, he proceeded to berate me for my pathetic effort on the play.  As he yelled and shook my facemask, spit flew from his mouth onto my glasses, cheeks, and lips.  He let me know without question that I, and I alone, was the only person responsible for the effort I gave.  This incident occurred in front of at least 100 people, most of them my age, and at the tender age of 13, I was mortified by the embarrassment.  As soon as Coach Greene finished humiliating me, he turned to the other team’s coach and ordered him to run the same play.  “Yes, sir,” was the only response.

On my second attempt, I nearly killed the poor ball carrier, and even before I could get to my feet, here came Coach Greene.  Again, he grabbed my facemask and sprayed me with spittle, but this time it was in congratulations.  Even at 13, I got it.  My effort was the only difference in the two plays, and despite the humiliation, or maybe more accurately because of it, I learned in that moment the importance of giving my all.  To this day, I cherish Coach Greene for teaching me that so early in life.

Today, however, he would be fired the moment he touched me.  The spit alone would be grounds for a lawsuit, and that, I wholeheartedly believe, is the crux of where we’ve strayed as a nation.  In a misguided attempt to protect young people’s feelings, we have robbed educators of some the most powerful teaching weapons in the arsenal.  Humiliation, shame, and fear are mighty motivators, and some of the best life lessons we learn have to bruise our feelings to leave a lasting impression.  From my own experience I can attest, the humiliation faded rather quickly, but the lesson has lasted my entire life.  Thank you, Coach Greene, for caring enough to teach me that lesson.